A Theological Framework for Assessing Verbal Oppression in Marriage

Abstract

In this dissertation, I argue that because language originates in the triune God, married image bearers are commanded to use language in ways that reflect God’s character, function according to his purposes, and conform to his moral standards, to the benefit of their spouses and their marital covenant. Because the chief design purpose of language is love that builds up, verbal spousal oppression constitutes egregious violations against God, the spouse, and the marital covenant itself; such speech carries the power to detrimentally impact the spouse in both soul and body. Chapter 1 introduces the topic and presents my thesis and a survey of existing relevant literature. Chapter 2 illuminates the theological nature of language, emphasizing the triune God as language’s origin and source and offering scriptural, historical, and contemporary support. Chapter 3 analyzes the anthropological nature of language, emphasizing its centrality to image-bearing as the mechanism by which humanity is empowered to know and commune with God and one another and to influence and shape one another. Speech-act theory is applied to highlight speech as intentional acts that induce intended or unintended effects upon hearers. Chapter 4 argues language is moral in nature and that humans, as moral agents, are responsible before God for how they use it. God’s character, his Son, and his Word constitute the moral norms against which language should be assessed. Chapter 5 asserts that language is covenantal in nature and that its proper use is integral to forming and sustaining the marital covenant. Based on a complementarian perspective, I assert that verbal oppression violates God’s design and mission for marriage. Chapter 6 argues the misuse of language toward the detriment of one’s spouse constitutes violations against God, the spouse, God’s moral law, and the marital covenant itself. I adapt speech-act theory to present an anatomy of oppressive language. Chapter 7 discusses the implications of the preceding chapters and presents a theological-anthropological-moral-covenantal framework to apply in counseling those who verbally oppress their spouses and those who suffer verbal spousal oppression. Two tools are offered for use in counseling. Chapter 8 presents a summary and concluding thoughts.